The Importance of Becoming Yourself

The Importance of Becoming Yourself

What the hell is this crazy woman talking about? “How could I not be myself?” you might be asking. I’m not referring to your physical flesh, but rather your mind, wisdom and future self. Thus I’d like to ask you:

How Much Are You Yourself?

What defines who we are? Are you any different from when you were as a child? Do you enjoy the same foods? Do you enjoy the same TV shows? Do you even have the same personality?

You might have heard that as time goes on, we grow. But that is not entirely correct; what makes us grow is not time itself, but rather our experiences. These experiences shape who we are, and what we focus on in life. Mind you, not all experiences are positive, and some of these negative experiences might never bring anything positive to our lives, but those aren’t the kind of experiences I’d like to talk about. I’m talking about experiences that are acquired through experimentation… willingly, that is.

What are you going to be like 5 years from now? 10 years from now? 30? It’s not a question that is easily answered for a lot of people, especially youths. How can you confidently start a long term relationship, boldly claiming you’ll be together forever, if you have no idea what you’ll be like in the distant future?

Why You Should Be Willing to Experiment

The more experiences we have in life, the more we discover ourselves, and the younger you start, the more it will train your brain in a more permanent fashion to make you better at the things you do on a regular basis. Essentially, the sooner we discover our passions and start applying them, the better we will be at them for the rest of our lives!

But it’s not as though if you’re over 30 that it’s all over. Unlike what was previously thought, brain plasticity never fully stops; it only slows down. But even if we were to say that your brain stopped developing, you would still have so much to explore! There are so many things that you have yet to try! Life always has a flux of new things to offer.

We have so many senses that give us so many different ways to experience what the world has to offer. No matter if an experience is negative, neutral or positive (or even a combination thereof), just exploring new things should be fun, and it will also greatly enrich your life! It makes you interesting and gives you that much to express and talk about! And if that wasn’t enough, you’ll have acquired such a large database of things you enjoy that your life will never get boring.

Note: While we do not condone this, if you decide to experiment with drugs, at least do proper research and remember that your life is ultimately in your own hands and not anyone else’s. Getting addicted to substances could easily ruin your life, or even end it. Stay safe.

Exploring During Relationships

Exploring during your relationships is especially important, because there are things you may not be able to experience otherwise. That is, unless you have friends willing to experiment more with the “romantic” side of things. If you are the average person though, you will prefer to explore these more intimate facets with your partner: dancing, sexuality, sensory play, sensuality, BDSM (which doesn’t have to include pain or sex), etc.

No matter what you decide to explore, you’ll be able to discover how you feel about new things at the same time! And if you have already experienced something amazing yourself while your partner hasn’t, imagine the excitement you’ll feel about sharing the experience with them!

Why It Is Dangerous and Morally Wrong Not To

Love is not a game. Often, lives are on the line. Whether is it the life of children, your own or your (ex-)partner’s, futures can be jeopardized and lives could end. I, myself, had two uncles that had killed themselves over their girlfriends breaking up with them. This is not a joke; you should never ever play with someone’s heart.

Some people receive suicide threats such as: “If you break up with me, I’ll kill myself”. Putting your life on hold for these people could be extremely detrimental to your mental health and well-being. But, even if more often than not these threats are used as a means to manipulate, these situations should be approached delicately as someone’s life could actually be on the line. In the end, while everyone is responsible for their own lives, that still doesn’t mean it is morally acceptable to toy with another’s feelings.

Why It Is so Important

Love is amazing. We know first-hand. It is precious and should always make the lives of those involved that much more amazing. By experimenting and getting to know yourself better:

  • You’ll know better in advance if someone would be a good match for you or not
  • You’ll focus on relationships that work better, end the ones that don’t work faster, and minimize the amount of heartbreaks
  • You’ll recover more easily from breakups
  • You’ll have so many more things to try out with your current or future partner(s)

Why You Should Aim to Become Your Best Self

Do you believe there is someone out there worth your time and love? Or maybe you’ve already found someone. Either way, wouldn’t you want to be the best possible —you— for them?

Becoming your best self is not so much an objective that you should aim for before you next relationship — it is a journey. One that might last decades, and may only end on your deathbed. But what’s important is deciding to embark on this journey and seeking to improve yourself everyday, for yourself, the world, and especially for the ones you love. Sometimes it can be hard to get started and know what to focus on, but we’re here to help:

By tackling this challenge, what you will get out of it, is being the best possible lover for your current/future partner(s). Do they, after all, deserve any less? In fact, thanks to this, they might very well feel like they don’t deserve you! Not to worry though, as it is not a real threat to the relationship when the love is genuine. You can, after all, simply push them to grow, just as you chose to. And the best part? You’ll be doing it together.

Categories: Dating Advice, Self-Improvement

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