5 Surprising Reasons People Fall out of Love

It is undeniable that in most cases incompatibility is the main reason that the love is dying. The following article is meant to open your mind to alternate reasons of love fading away, as too many people jump to conclusions and break up with their partner, when, it they had found and corrected the real root cause, the love would have been revived.

1. Hormonal Imbalance

While hormonal imbalance usually afflicts the elderly more than any other age group, it is still very possible to be affected by it from any age starting from puberty (if it even happened at all). It is a condition that is often overlooked, and it is the cause of countless cases of infertility, depression, anxiety, anger issues, blemishes, physical pain, and so on.

This means that hormones, and thus a lack thereof, have a huge impact on our mental state, especially when it comes to the ability to feel empathy and love. Both low and high levels of testosterone or estrogen can be a cause. But if the person has very high testosterone levels, it could get converted to estrogen, giving the ability to feel empathy & love again… albeit probably in a different way. In the case of transgender or intersexed individuals, sex hormones from the sex they were born with could cause hormonal imbalance in the brain even at normal levels, while others might experience hormonal imbalance in the brain with both male and female hormones.

But this condition can have several causes. While your hormonal levels can be raised or lowered through prescription medication, it would also be important to look at the person’s stress levels as well as their diet as HRT can greatly reduce a person’s life span. But not treating the condition at all could also shorten the person’s life, on top of very high fracture rates from reduced bone density in the case of those with too low hormone levels.

2. Medication & Illicit Substances

Many prescription medications can actually alter your ability to give and/or receive love. Sometimes medication that is not marketed in any way for its effects on the brain. Always check the side effects of every medication that a person is taking to rule out these medications as a cause.

But there are other prescription medications that have the intended effect to alter the brain: psychiatric medications. Whether we speak of SSRIs or other antidepressants as well as anti-psychotics, their effects on the brain can be devastating. One of the most common symptoms of these medications is a lack of sexual drive… but it also equally affects the patient’s ability to give and receive love.

If you think that supplements are inherently safe, think twice. Unfortunately, in many countries, including the United States and Canada, regulations for supplements are far too lenient. Even if you do get what was promised in your bottle, it doesn’t mean that the quality is there. Fish oil, for example, goes rancid very quickly when exposed to oxygen and loses all its benefits when exposed to heat as well. If you open a fish oil capsule and it smells fishy, you have yourself some worthless fish oil that could be very detrimental to your health.

There are many illicit substances that will affect the brain, boosting empathy, such as MDMA. But, while people might seem overflowing with love while they are on these drugs, the following days they might completely lack it and avoid any kind of human interaction. Abuse, as in repeated usage, will cause the brain to require the drug to feel as much empathy as it normally would, had the person never taken the substance. But no matter what, any substance abuse can be toxic to a romantic relationship.

Withdrawal symptoms of medication and illicit substances can cause a variety of physical and mental ailments, which can all contribute to a person’s inability to feel love. Psychiatric medication withdrawal, for example, can cause severe nausea, chronic pain, insomnia, and of course, limited or non-existant ability to love. As a general rule of thumb, the longer the person has been taking a drug and the higher the dosage was, the more their body will require it to function and the stronger a connection is required to them help through it.

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3. Chronic Stress

You may have heard of a large portion of the adult population of Japan that foregoes love and relaxation, working tirelessly at their jobs to the point of exhaustion. Sleeping at your desk rather than at home is a show of dedication and hard work. Even a greeting of, “you look tired” is colloquially a compliment.

Chronic stress worsens every aspect of your life, and is heavily linked to chronic fatigue, chronic pain, autoimmune conditions, shorter life span and so on. Living so that stress doesn’t rule your life should be one of your highest priorities. The effects of stress can be mitigated with a healthy diet and relaxation techniques such as meditation or yoga/pilates. If all else fails, the source of the stress itself should be removed. Thankfully, the younger generation of Japan is catching on to this.

4. Inappropriate Diet

Most people don’t realize how much diet influences our ability to think & feel. You might have heard that our gut is our second brain, and I could not agree more. You should always aim to get the best nutrients you can, while being mindful of any food allergies and sensitivities you might have. After all, some of the most nutrient dense foods have high allergenic rates, owed to their survival mechanisms to offset just how enticing or important they are for consumption. Remember that while vitamins are important, some minerals are heavily overlooked despite how incredibly essential they are to our well-being:

Magnesium is an extremely important component in your ability to relax. The more stressed you are, the more magnesium your body uses. The less magnesium your body has, the more you will suffer from stress. Therefore, a lack of magnesium can take you by surprise because what didn’t stress you out so much yesterday, affects you greatly today. Try to consume a good amount everyday to avoid this. Nuts and beans are generally high in magnesium.

Potassium is crucial for your body to stay calm. A potassium/sodium balance is very important to maintain; sodium helps your muscles move while potassium allows them to relax. A lack of potassium can cause insomnia, frequent muscle twitches, heart arrhythmia/palpitations, chronic fatigue, digestive problems, and so on. Thanks to potassium’s long biological half-life, you can skip a few days at a time, but you also need to consume enough to maintain the balance. Greens and grass-fed meats are high in potassium.

Of course, there are many, many other important and essential vitamins and nutrients, but these two are too often overlooked.

5. Depression

This is the last item in the list, as depression can be legitimately caused by every single thing mentioned above. It can be extremely debilitating, even making you completely disinterested in everything you love, including your partner. You can get it from a drug, going off a drug, from nutritional deficiencies, hormonal imbalance and stress. You might also develop it because of environmental factors, life situations, infections, too little exposure to sunlight, post-concussion syndrome, etc. There are so many different causes, and some people give up on trying to find the root cause of their depression, assuming that there is no reason; it’s just how things are — life screwed them over.

It can be complicated to be in a relationship with someone suffering from depression, as they might always suffer from it for the rest of their lives, no matter how hard you try. Thankfully, most depressions are situational and can be cured.

If the person suffering from depression has had it from a very young age, a treatment that can definitively help them could take years of effort and error to find, and it may just always be an uphill battle. But whether the onset of depression occurred at a young or late age, every option should be explored to find the root cause. If depression has set in during your relationship, do not be too hasty to assume that it surfaced because your relationship isn’t what it used to be; it could very well be the opposite — that your relationship has suffered because of depression. Everyone at some point needs help in their lives to figure out what is not right with their lives and the steps towards making things better.

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